This script is almost complete… we realize that any script needs to be reworked a bit to fit the people who will be acting the parts, as well as fit the time you have available. You may want your drama team to work in some additional “gags” (you’ll see what we mean when you read the script) and develop the characters’ personalities some more. Make sure your actors (especially Fraidy, the “patient”) are real outgoing, stage-hogging hams; students who know how to act and who won’t be ridiculed by the audience.
(Author’s note: As I wrote this skit out, I became pretty sure that I’ve seen it somewhere before. It may not be entirely original with me… but I cannot remember where or when I would have encountered it. I guess that’s one of the hazards of being in youth ministry for twenty-five years! If you are the original author of this drama sketch, or know who is, interlínc would love to give due credit.)
Ms. Goodfiler, the Receptionist
Mr. Timmy Fraidy, the Patient
Dr. Psychobabble, the Psychiatrist
Receptionist’s desk or table
Doctor’s desk or table
Three chairs
A couch
A psychiatrist’s office.
Recep: (To Fraidy, who is offstage) Mr. Fraidy? The doctor will see you now.
Fraidy: (Entering) Yeah… I know. (Starts to walk across stage into Doctor’s office. Stops, turns around to face Ms. Goodfiler.) Oh, and Miss? Your pastrami sandwich will leak all over your dress. You’ll want to get more napkins.
Recep: What? What pastrami sandwich?
Fraidy: The one you’ll have for lunch in about twenty minutes. Get extra napkins. And have a couple of towels handy, would you?
Recep: (Looking at him doubtfully.) Uh, sure. Okay. Thanks, Mr. Fraidy.
Fraidy: You’re welcome. (Turns and walks into Doctor’s office.)
Dr: (With back to Fraidy, putting papers away) Come on in. (Fraidy is already in, sits in chair.) Have a seat. (Fraidy slouches in chair.) Make yourself (turns around to see Fraidy already seated and slouched… short pause)… comfortable. Would you like some coffee?
Fraidy: Yes, please.
Dr: Would you…
Fraidy: Black is fine.
Dr: …like some cream or… (Looks oddly at Fraidy). Ms. Goodfiler, would you get Mr. Fraidy and me some coffee?
Recep: Right away, Dr. Psychobabble.
Fraidy: (As she’s leaving) And don’t forget the towels!
Dr: (Seats himself at desk, looks at papers from Fraidy’s file.) So, Mr. Fraidy, you claim to know
the future.
Fraidy: I don’t claim to know the future, I do know the future!
Dr: Oh I see. And how is this possible?
Fraidy: I dunno, Doc. Ever since I was a small child, I’ve always known the future.
Dr: (Skeptically) Tell me more.
Fraidy: I’m certain you don’t believe me right now, Doc. But you will in just a few moments.
Dr: (Shuffling papers, getting pencil and pad out) Well, Mr. Fraidy, why don’t we…
Fraidy: This is gonna hurt.
Dr: What’s going to hurt?
Recep: (Enters with two cups) Here’s your coffee, Doctor. (Reaches over Fraidy to give cup to Dr., spills coffee on Fraidy).
Fraidy: Oowww! That’s what hurts!
Recep: Oh, Mr. Fraidy! I’m so sorry!
Fraidy: (Trying to “laugh” through the pain) That’s alright, it’s only 2nd-degree burns.
Recep: I’ll go get…
Fraidy: Those towels.
Recep: Yes... those towels. (Turns to leave.)
Fraidy: Gesundheit!
Recep: Aachoo! (Leaves)
Dr: (Looking incredulous) Mr. Fraidy! I do believe you know the future!
Fraidy: That’s what I’ve been trying to tell ya, Doc.
Recep: Here’s the towels. Doctor, I’m going to take my lunch break now. I’ll put the phones on voice mail. (Leaves)
Dr: Well, this is absolutely unprecedented! I’ve never heard of anything like this before! We must delve into this further! Tell me how you came about this remarkable ability!
Fraidy: Doc, what I’d like is for you to help me get rid of this ability.
Dr: Get rid of it?! I would think it would be quite an asset!
Fraidy: It’s no asset, believe me.
Dr: Oh, come on! I would think you’d be rich from betting on the horses. Or, you’d be tremendously popular… a hit at parties…
Fraidy: Well, Doc, when you tell someone they’re about to get in a horrible car accident, or contract a debilitating disease, it tends to put a damper on things at parties.
Dr: Still, I think knowing the future would really help a person.
Fraidy: Doc, you have no idea. Knowing the future terrifies me! How would you like to know every single rotten thing that will ever happen to you before it happens? And there is nothing you can do to stop them from happening to you!
Dr: There’s nothing you can do?
Fraidy: Nothing! For instance, one morning I had a premonition that I was going to get injured in a truck accident. So I called in sick. Didn’t leave the house all day long. I made it all the way up to 9:00 that night. And do you know what happened?
Dr: Tell me, I’m fascinated.
Fraidy: I slipped and broke my arm! You wanna know what I slipped on? A Tonka…
Both Toy Truck!
Dr: Oh, I see! Well, this really is a problem! So what do you want me to do?
Fraidy: I was hoping you could maybe hypnotize me, make me forget the future!
Dr: I don’t think that…
Fraidy: Or maybe a frontal lobotomy! That should do the trick!
Dr: That’s seems a little drastic…
Fraidy: (Excited, almost frantic, he grabs the Dr.’s coat) Anything! Do anything!
Dr: Mr. Fraidy! Get ahold of yourself! (Fraidy collapses in the chair.)
Recep: (Enters, with pastrami stains all over her dress, wiping them with towels.) Doctor, your next patient is here. (Gives Fraidy a strange “How’d you know?” look. Leaves)
Dr: So, Mr. Fraidy, I am very curious and interested in your predicament. Tell me, what are you going to do?
Fraidy: Well, Doc, I guess that’s for me to know and you to find out!